It's November, and 2013 is coming to an end, so I took the time off to reflect not just what have I done for this whole year but actually what have I been doing for the past three years, think of the timeline of when I started my relationship with my bf, Yongjie. It took me back, ups and downs between us, for those who think that we doesn't fight, WE DO.
The first picture we took as a couple three years ago in Zouk, when I had nose piercing, a little fats which he called FAT and sexy and with really crappy eyeliner outline and him in his coolest shirt THEN, and 10 years never change kind of hairstyle. But well, I need to post it as this is actually the look we feel in love with each other. Three years later, to:
Me in long black hair, with an inner tube all the time, skinny, no more piercings, more decent kind of make up (I think) and him wider chest, normal tee and khaki slim fit pants and Captain Sam kind of hairstyle.
THREE YEARS AND THREE MONTHS up to date and still counting. We both changed so much, not just physically, but both mentally and emotionally. We both made each other a better person, and just loving each other more and more and yes we made a promise that we will appreciate and remember every single thing we both done for each other and will never take it for granted. I remembered in our second year, we quarreled like mad couple, over everything, from where to eat to a single parking spot which after a while the whole arguing just stopped, as we said as long we are not breaking up with each other, there's no reason to argue. So yea, we stopped arguing altogether from then. Pretty awesome I know, every time when the atmosphere got tensed up, one of us would make the move to hug the other one and yes that is a power hug and apologize of course. I will always ask him to come over and hug me so that he would apologize to me first, haha, I know I'm bad that way! :)
Anyway, why is this post about his family you must have wondered. It's more to a lovey vomit story between me and him. Yucks haha. I'm getting there, as I sat down and reflected on my relationship, whole lot of other things falls into it as well. Both our families played great part in our relationship as well.
I felt so much love with his family, when I said so much, I can't even measure it myself. In this course of three years, I've not only grown to be a better girlfriend, but I've grown to be a better person, a better friend, a better daughter, a better sister, and most importantly a better a son's girlfriend.
People always said relationship is about the two person sharing lives together as one doing everything together, showering each other with so much love and starting a family together, but in this three years plusss, and so many instances in this past few months made me realized relationship is not about the two person, but is about two families. I'm not going to talk about both families coming in as one as I will leave it to the wedding day when I'm finally someone's wife and daughter in law. Today, I'm going to just talk about my boyfriend's family.
In the first year we both got together on 2010, it was the honeymoon period where everything is just me and you, oh so sweet, spending all the time together, just me and you, JUST ME AND YOU! Until an extend my bf went home late at night, skipping family dinner and home dinner and whole lot of other family gathering (yes, I'm super guilty over it now). But then, I was 22 years old, still in the state of mind of JUST ME AND YOU AGAINST THE WORLD WITHOUT THINKING FURTHER. My bf loves me, he would never tell me about his problems or if his parents were unhappy over it, cause yes I admit, we argued about it sometimes (my fault, YES!) 😑
Then I met his parents and two other sister for the first time in 2010, super awkward, super shy, super do not know what to do next (what to say, what to do, how to eat, how to sit, how to dress). First meeting, obviously, super proper with long sleeve and pants with no make up.
Being together for three years plus wasn't a short period of time, I stayed with my brother in KL and my parents back hometown and both other sisters overseas. I spent most of my time with my boyfriend, going out whenever we have time because I was afraid to go to his house as I didn't like the whole super don't know what to do feeling with his parents. So I would pull him out, hey I wanna eat this today I wanna do that this weekend with almost ZERO time spend at home. Still me and him against the world lah then. Then, he started to get busy with his work and gets really tired and with the whole going here and there eating everything is draining us out as well and he would come and just spent time in my house. Please do not get me wrong, his parents super nice, where his mom would cook me awesome nice food, maybe just the dad LOOKED a little fierce and strict.
If you knew me, you would know I'm that kind of person who hates judgment kind of thing so best way for me not getting judge, I ignored, but til a point how long u wanna ignore lah right. I took the courage to talk more to his mom, but at the same time still super scared of his dad (looked fierce no choice but actually super nice).
This year was the year I really opened up to talk to his mom like about everything, everything about me cause I was thinking she needs to know about me if I wanted acceptance right. First, no more running, secondly, no point putting up long sleeve if I'm going to post my ootd everyday on Facebook right. I hate hypocrites so I didn't want to be one. Then yea, I told his mom everything about me, my past, how I was before, my family, issues, what I like to do (shopping, dressing up), what I think and whole lot more about me lah. My bf was concerned with this whole open up honesty, but I told him, baby, if I need someone to accept me for who I am, first of all I need to be honest of who I really am right? But yea happy ending, his mom was cool about it, I guess his dad too, maybe I'm a little different from the other girl, but he never show me that kind of weird look or show me black face when we have dinner together so I guessed I passed right (but of course I never let half ball lah). We spend more time at home, just being home, make it a deal to have family dinner every Sunday which we totally missed for the whole first year (still super guilty) and do more sharing of what's happening in our daily lives or sometimes just plain gossiping and crapping. Mine for now just sleep, wake up assignment, proscrastinate, eat, watch drama, being a lazy pig and sleep) until I start working, SOON! 😊
I spent a lot more time at his house recently, and his sweetest mom would buy me breakfast and lunch (Omg). I always always thanked her mom, but I just felt a THANK YOU VERY MUCH AUNTY is never enough. And his dad would bring me to really nice dinner over the weekend, yummers ❤️
When his room have like super crazy a lot of ants that's driving me nuts and come sharing even my milk, his dad called the pest control. When my bf's blanket that he used since forever young became one piece of thin cloth that any air would go through, his dad would put another new blanket in the room. When his fan that's still functioning but with no cool air from it, there's a new fan the following day. And yes all these was done without any notice (yes, super awesome and I noticed it). I would listened to my bf telling me how his dad would help him with his homework when he was really young a night before his new intake starts, which he obviously never do the whole holiday. I just knew he was such a great dad.
So much for a great mom and great dad, I would think of course, Yongjie is their son right? But when they start caring for me like I'm one of the family member I just can't stop feeling touched in my heart (can't say tears cause like super drama). His mom would cook my favorite food, his dad would order my favorite vegetables (the only vege I eat). So many other little things that impossible can list down here lah, like really so many others, I remember details, hehe 😍💋❤️
But one incident that truly inspired this post was, I had a recent back pain due to my Kungfu fighting while asleep, sprained a little, it was painful when I walk, drive, laugh or even move (being the Facebook addict me, of course I announced to the world, hehe). His mom saw, and asked me to take care of myself, no high heels until it's cured, rest more and all. BUT GUESS WHAT!!??
Yesterday my bf showed me a text from his mom, telling him that his dad had this ointment from his last back sprained which was really effective and asked his mom to ask Yongjie to bring it for me (touched, I'm so touched) because this come from his super cool and fierce looking dad that I'm so scared of. Then today I went out with my bf (feeling much better), his mom sent him a text and asked if I'm better, and if not asked him to bring me to his home and stay there and she can take care of me. TAKE CARE OF ME as I need to lie on the bed (at this point I was so touched I tear).
I grew up and maturing into a stage having the thoughts that I do not need to depend on anyone as no one has the obligation to care of you or they would. But this month, they totally changed my mind, it was pure genuine love that I never expected it to be so much. I just keep telling my bf that, no baby, it's okay, I really do not want to trouble your mom and dad, I'm fine, I'm okay on my own.
Yeah, I'm okay, I always makes everything okay, but I realized that when I fall today, I have so many great people there to hold me, to take care of me. A simple word of THANK YOU VERY MUCH UNCLE AND AUNTY WOULD NEVER BE ENOUGH.
But in return, you teach me how to love even more, and that's exactly what I'm going to do. In this three years and three months, I must say, I learnt to love just not one person unconditionally, but all of his family members as well (one step at a time) unconditionally. I really am appreciating every single thing you have done for me, just like I'm as precious, a family. I would call you my family one day when I actually get marry to Yongjie, but no matter what happens in future, all these good deeds, I will remember it for the rest of my life, how I've been taught to love more of others. THANK YOU VERY MUCH UNCLE AND AUNTY :) ❤️❤️❤️
PS# Not forgetting Yongjie's sisters as well, Ginny and Debbie, though we are so different but thank you being great and nice to me! I appreciate it too! :)
Finally, I told my boyfriend again, sometimes, I felt I never deserve any of these great things and he just said, "baby, don't be silly, you are a great person, you deserved every single of these, yea I cried".
Selfie to end my post, lol, vain (I know it already). Thanks for reading, hope you would start loving others a little more today! Bye 😊
Love,
AmnestyDing
